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6 Steps To Slow Down For Better Sex

Posted by Maureen Pollack on

As we rush through the holidays, work, and everyday life, many of us suffer from one of the most dangerous conditions known to vulvas: the “Quickie Syndrome.” Ya know, when you skip foreplay and hurry through sex or masturbation and continue about your day (or onto a sleepy night). Fortunately, there’s something we can do about it. Slow down for better sex, babe, and feel the full capacity of our pleasure!

Slow Down For The Better Sex

While it may be convenient (or all the time you’ve got), quickie’s rob us of something essential: the unique experience and important build up of our arousal. Let’s not forget, on average, it takes vulva owners approximately 20 minutes of sustained sexual arousal to achieve full arousal.

Slow down, embrace your pleasure, and get aroused,
Take it slow, babe, and embrace your pleasure

Take a break from flash orgasms that feel “just okay,” and turn them into waves of big O’s packed with TNT for a massive EXPLOSION.

6 Steps To Slow Down For Better Sex

Step 1: Let’s Get Tingly With An Arousal Balm

The most important step of all when exploring our arousal is intention setting. 

  • Set the intention of making time for yourself (If partnered, you can also set the intention to enjoy an experience together).
  • Intentions made, it’s time to get the buzz started with an arousal balm, such as Lovability’s Bomb Balm Arousal Balm. Simply rub a small amount of the balm onto your clitoris, adding more as you see fit once the effects take place, and allow 3-5 minutes to start feeling its buzzing, tingly effects! 
  • While the tingling sets in, you’ll start to notice that your clitoris and vulva may start to feel extra sensitive and “juicy”. If you look with a mirror, you’ll see a change in color and “swell” to your vulva. This is the normal arousal response, meaning blood flow is heading to the area and heating you up for a good time.
Use arousal balm to accelerate your arousal
Arousal balm – for her, him or they – gets you aroused faster

Step 2: Set the Mood For The Perfect Bath

As you let the Bomb Balm Arousal Balm work its magic, start building your perfect goddess bath to enjoy solo or with a partner …

  • Turn off your phone or any distractions that may be present
  • Get some mood lighting – turn down the lights and light some candles
  • Adjust to a comfortable water pressure and temperature
  • Turn on a sexy playlist or just enjoy the sound of rushing water

If you have a partner, this is a great way to get your partners involved and start foreplay. (Pro Tip: use a massage candle(s) to set the mood and allow your partner to participate in your pleasure.) Whether they are watching you or joining you, it’s a great way to get aroused before getting into sex.

Candles are a great way to slow you down and set the mood for better sex
Use candles to help you slow down and set the mood

Step 3: Relax & Enjoy The Rhythm Of The Water

The mood’s set and it’s time to enjoy bathtub masturbation with The WaterSlyde. Many vulva owners don’t realize that arousal takes time and consistent stimulation. Don’t get discouraged when you try new sensations. That being said, we cannot stress enough to ditch the rushing and make space for exploration and receiving!

  • As you take deep breaths, let your body relax and put attention to your vulva
  • The arousal balm should now be fully absorbed, so you’ll notice that the water trickling over your vulva will feel a lot like oral sex … offering a warm, wet caress
  • If your partner is with you, try having them sit behind you in the tub
  • Close your eyes, take deep breaths, and feel into this space
Slow down by taking a bath - solo or with a partner
A great way to slow down is to lose yourself in the bath

Step 4: Repeat Step 3 (We Know You’re Rushing It)

For real, we know you’re rushing it! Lean in and give yourself at least five minutes with The WaterSlyde to get into the rhythm and pulse of the water. We promise, it won’t disappoint.

"I Want More," because self care isn't selfish. Take time for yourself.
Self care isn’t selfish, babe. Take time for yourself!

Step 5: Continue Solo or Move to Sex

By now, you may feel your pleasure building or you’ve already enjoyed one or more orgasms. We’re here for it!

  • You can stay in that position and continue to ride the waves
  • Or, you may feel ready to take it to the bedroom (if you can even make it there)!
Giving yourself time to be fully aroused will lead to better sex
Giving yourself time to be fully aroused will lead to better sex

Remember that if you use an oil-based arousal balm and plan to use latex condoms for sex, completely wash off any remaining balm before using a latex condom; some oils – like the deliciously moisturizing coconut oil in our Bomb Balm Arousal Balm – may break down the structure of latex, increasing the risk of the condom ripping.

Step 6: Rinse and Repeat

Trust us, babe. With the experience you’ve just had, we’re pretty confident you’ll do it anyways.

Prioritize your pleasure - slow down for better sex
Prioritize your pleasure, babe!

Invest in Yourself & Your Pleasure

Doesn’t it feel absolutely magical to invest time into yourself, your pleasure, and/or your partnered experiences? Not only does intention and time go a long way, but so does giving your arousal the space to blossom.

If you enjoyed my recommendation for how to slow down for better sex, check out our Arousal Tips & Tricks. It’s got more ideal for how to get aroused, build up sensation, and enjoy mind-blowing pleasure.

Have your own ideas for how to enhance your pleasure and bath time? Please share them. We love hearing from you!

Love, Maureen Xx

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